Sunday, September 4, 2011

To Catch A Predator

I have a compulsive need to figure out the most efficient way of doing something. This has caused me problems in almost every situation in my life because people in general are shitheads. So I have been watching clips online of this American t.v. show called To Catch a Predator and I have figured out ways to not get caught if you happen to be a pedophile.** If you are an English teacher with mandatory office hours and computer access come watch t.v. with me.

Before we get started the shows unofficial anthem from the late great Mr. Keith Sweat*

Abdullah sending dick shots was not a good look. I've met hundreds of women from around the world and I haven't met one that was exactly pining away for dick shots. And why is he wearing Dockers? Who wears Dockers and Sperry's to illicit fuck sessions . "Who is this beeech" I'm Egypt I'm Muslim I don' do that" lol.

Interior landscape design? Is that like potted plants. Sounds to me like someone who grows weed indoors. At least the Tae Kwon Do instructor was smart enough to be suspicious. I didn't know asking for sex from a child was illegal. Live and learn but you could make the argument since the decoys were over 18 he never technically solicited a child.

I think instead of fat old Floridian women they should hire Bill Duke to do the interview in the police station.

Why does the first person look like a Black man in white face?

You're not a cop
No Way

Chris Hanson is so stupid. He say's Refino has two small children at home and one on the way. So why would he be out looking for underage girls? Duh

Tip 1: Young girls don't want to discuss their virginias or your dick. So if you
say something along the lines of I want to bury my face in your crotch and
lap up your sweet, sweet, sex juice and she responds with anything other
than that is disgusting. You are probably talking to a person who at the
very least isn't 12 years old. Also teenagers want to be older not younger
so the odds of you talking to a 14 year who says he/she is 14 is quite small.

Tip 1A: Ask her for proof of life questions like where do you go to school? What grade are you in? Who taught you last year?

Tip 2: Ask for a picture that is very specific. Nothing sexual of course but
something that indicates you are talking to a live person. If she refuses for any reason it's a trick of some sort. I have at least 3 things in this room right now that can take and send pics. And never send your picture.

Tip 3: Get there early. It seems to me that those rigs and cameras would take a few
hours to setup so if you get there early enough you are bound to see people
coming and going from the house. Chris Hanson isn't sleeping in a shell
the night before and the police aren't going to pay for 4 hours of overtime
to have them stake the house out.

Tip 3: Pizza delivery. An hour before you get to the house go to the local delivery
place and tell them that you have to go to work in an hour and then pre-pay
for a small cheese pizza to be delivered to your kids who are home alone.
Park across the street and see who answers the door. Then ask the pizza
driver on the way out what did the girl/boy look like.

Tip 4: Let the air out of one of your tires and drive to her house. Knock on the
door and see who answers. If the decoy answers ask to use the phone to call
a tow truck. She'll probably refuse to let you in but that's o.k. you want
to see the actress from the community theater up close.

Tip 5: Send a taxi with instructions to take her to a local mall. A 14 year old bent on fucking would have no problem going to the mall. But police officers aren't looking for a confrontation in a crowded public place.

I guess in the end it is a good thing these guys are pretty fucking stupid.

*Keith Sweat isn't dead as of 09/06/11
The good people at Blackchild Industries do not encourage child banging.

1 comment:

  1. So much fakery in those TCAP videos....smh. I do think a Bill Duke character would have made an excellent addition

    "I know who you are Chris Hansen, but see, I calls you Chris Handsome." That opening scene was classic.