Friday, June 25, 2010

Weenie Nation unfinished post

Over the next couple of weeks I'm going to release some of my unfinished post on Korea. Because even my unfinished work is funnier than my contemporaries.


An extremely insecure person ... This person cares excessively about everything around them and tries hard for approval. He or she acts cool on the outside (or tries to) but in reality they are a true pussy at heart. ... He or she has the tendency to be wrong or unjust all the time-Urban Dictionary

The problem with Korea isn't xenophobia, racism, or kimchi jingoism. The problem is the rarely diagnosed form of hyper-weenieism that has permeated every pore of the culture. The weenieism manifest itself in many ways but there are two scenarios that are common to foreign teachers. First, the ability to make a decision without deferring to someone else. Even if it is within their sphere of responsibility I have never asked a question in 3 years of kimchi conversation that was instantly answered even if I was speaking to the boss/owner . Second, when they come back from there weenie conclave they usually produce the wrong answer so they must be sent back for further deliberation.

Weenie Historical View

According to Koreans the Han kingdom has been invaded roughly every 6 years for the last 5000 years. Their inability to defend themselves physically manifest itself into a psychological and cultural impulse to resist any changes (improvements) brought on by contact with other cultures.I also believe that is why they have gone out of their way to develop the worst national cuisine in Asia and perfected sitting on the ground; even when chairs are available, and developing elaborate beds that mimic sleeping on the ground. I think it is an effort to make South Korea as unappealing as possible. And by God it worked. So for centuries they insulated themselves as best they could from outside contact and earned themselves the moniker of Hermit Kingdom for their troubles.Korea became an echo chamber of everything Korean good and since there were no foreigners around to dispute the claim that became the dominant mindset in Korea.

Only country in the world that has 4 seasons or electric fans and closed windows equals death.

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